Translation: Abu Ubayy Sharif Hamzah
Questioner: Between my husband's mother and me his wife, whom should he love more?
(The congregation laughed).
Answer: His mother! He must love both of you. Allaah says (as a deduction): I am happy with you when your mother is happy with you.
Therefore, Allaah is angry with you when your mother is angry with you. Whenever your mother is angry with you then there is problem.
Your mother is first (to be loved by you). Your mother gave birth to you before your wife met you.
But when the mother goes beyond the bounds (of Sharee'ah), or she is trying to prevent you from performing your responsibilities as the husband then you must use your sense at that point.
If your mother says: 'Don't give your wife five thousand to cook, two thousand is enough.' Just tell her: 'Mum, I heard you well, may Allaah lengthen your life, what do you want to eat?' You will rather go inside and give your wife five thousand because you know the two thousand (your mother said you should give her) won't be sufficient (to cook) as a result of the large number of your family.
(Perhaps the mother said that as a result of the price of foodstuffs in her area) but you know the prices in your area. Be balanced, do not offend your mother because of your wife.
And Allaah knows best.
Answered by Ustadh Qamardeen Yunus.
(Source: Question 6 on the tape: Duties and Rights of Spouses in Islaam).
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