It may come as a surprise to someone like Malik that Islam strongly discourages wife beating.
1. “Do not beat the female slaves of Allah.”
Narrated by ʿAbdullāh ibn Zamʿah:
The Prophet (peace be upon him) said:
> “None of you should flog his wife like he flogs a slave, and then have intercourse with her at the end of the day.”
— Sahih al-Bukhari 5204; Sahih Muslim 2855
2. “The best of you are those who are best to their wives.”
Narrated by ʿĀ’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her):
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) said:
> “The best of you is the best to his family, and I am the best among you to my family.”
— Sunan al-Tirmidhi 3895; Ibn Mājah 1977; Graded Sahih
3. “Never hit a woman!”, The Prophet never struck any of his wives.
Narrated by ʿĀ’ishah (may Allah be pleased with her):
> “The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) never struck anything with his hand—not a woman, nor a servant…”
— Sahih Muslim 2328
Now Malik will likely say, “But what about the Qur’anic verse?”:
> “Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because Allah has given some of them more than others and because they support them from their wealth. So righteous women are devoutly obedient, guarding in [the husband’s] absence what Allah would have them guard. As for those from whom you fear rebellion (nushūz), advise them; then [if they persist], forsake them in bed; and [finally] strike them (lightly). But if they obey you [once more], seek no means against them. Indeed, Allah is ever Exalted and Grand.”
— Qur’an 4:34
He would then argue that the Qur’an nevertheless permits wife beating.
Our response: Yes, but that is clearly discouraged, disapproved of, see the context of Hadiths we have just cited again. You know hadeeth interprets the Qur'aan.
In Islam, certain actions are technically permissible but morally discouraged (makrūh). Beating one's wife is not a reaardable act, one can even earn sins for it.
The Messenger of Allah (peace be upon him) further explained:
> “…(Beating) without leaving any mark (ḍarban ghayra mubarriḥ).”
— Sunan Abī Dāwūd
Even this is prescribed only as a last resort, to serve as a symbolic reprimand—never a violent act—and only when the marital bond is in danger of disintegrating.
Indeed, the man who refrains from even this last resort is among the best of men. And the Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) himself is the best example: he never beat any of his wives.
The Islamic message is clear: The best Muslim men are those who do not beat their wives, and the best women are those who uphold their duties and responsibilities.
Compare this to other societies: where Islamic teachings are well-implemented, domestic violence is far less common than in secular or even other religious contexts.
For instance:
For example, the lifetime prevalence of domestic violence among women in Saudi Arabia is estimated to be between 20%–39%, depending on the region.
However a survey by Called to Peace Ministries found that 85% of Christian women who experienced abuse were married to men identifying as Christians—30% of whom served in ministry roles, this in countries where Christian ethics are well observed.
These are verifiable facts.
The point? Islamic legislation often seeks to prevent abuse and social disorder before it happens. That is the context of Qur’an 4:34, and that is the wisdom behind its layered approach.
This is Part Six!
